When Are You Going to Give the Baby a Bottle?

As you prepare to welcome your child into the world, whether it is the first or next, there are literally millions of people who will tell you what to do. They come in the form of books, web sites, teachers, sages, family, friends and random strangers on the street. Of all the people who will have an opinion of how you should handle your parenting, those you must actually prepare for are the in-laws. If this were a film there would be a chilling, suspenseful sound effect just before the term “in-laws.”

Regardless of what kind of family you married into, or what kind of family you tried to marry out of for that matter, you will get suggestions and advice galore from every side and you will need a warehouse of answers to get you through. When your father-in-law asks if the baby is growing because he doesn’t think it will on your skim milk, just answer him. Beam your brightest and boast your angel’s weight while you pat yourself on the back. You’ll have to do this again next week, but eventually he won’t ask anymore. If your grandmother says it is time for your four-week-old baby to eat meat, simply tell her that the best thing for babies is breastmilk through their first year. If you find your mother-in-law about to feed your little patootie frosting from a can, remind her that you won’t be starting solids until the baby is about six months old and that when you do it will be a banana or an avocado and she can be first in the bib line.

Eventually your very own panel of experts will see that your child is thriving and growing despite the fact that he hasn’t even had formula. They will likely never want to hear more about why you made the choice that you did, but they will leave you alone about it.

Humankind has been raising babies for a very long time. Clearly, much of what we’ve done has been right. When it is your turn to join the ranks of the pro-creators, make some simple decisions about what direction you’re heading. Understanding why you’re doing what you’re doing will not only help you through the days when you ask yourself, “Why am I doing this?!” but will also provide you the answers you need for the naysayers. While you are making those plans, leave some room for tweaking. There are sages among us and they may have just the mothering morsel you’re looking for.

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