Beer and Other Words Toddlers Say

Logic would have it that we are supposed to learn things from raising our first child. For example, one would assume that after having the first child belt out “100 Bottles of Beer on the Wall” in the grocery store at age two, the second child would never hear the song. Unfortunately, the tune is quite soothing and has worked wonders with both of my children. Anyway, I have far worse stories about the child-parrot connection than a two-year-old in the grocery store saying “beer.”

A two-year-old singing about beer is just plain inappropriate. Other repeated words uttered at that age are downright horrifying. The words sound so different when little people say them, even when used in proper context. When this happens, it is actually a simple remedy: ignore it. Then go on to clean up your pre-parent mouth and move on. It works because toddlers will repeat whatever it is that you utter when a good, strong adjective is needed. “Confound it!”, for example, sounds a lot better than many other choices when the block tower he just built falls over, plus it has a little retro, British vibe going as well. Thomas the Tank Engine and Friends have many wonderful expressions that fit the bill. The block building was the situation when I got my message from the universe to begin expressing myself with civilized words. It worked and my ten-year-old’s days of cursing like a sailor were done by age three.

We can glean from this lesson how much our children truly imitate us. Certainly they are their own people, and become more so as they age, but what happens is much the same as the toddler and his swearwords. Children see us as the beacon of truth and look to us to help them decide how to be and who to become. “Do as I say and not as I do” does not work. If we want our children to improve upon the model of adult that we have provided them, we need to show them how we are striving to be better people. Showing children how to be human and learn from one’s mistakes is one of the best lessons we can teach. By letting children know that we are not finished, that there is work still to be done, they will begin to realize that it is OK to make mistakes. It is all right to fumble and flounder and flub. The beauty of life is the realization that you may just be able to make things right by learning something and jumping right back in.

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